Thursday, April 9, 2009

"It's Our Turn to Eat" - Available as an e-book


"It's Our Turn to Eat" - The book that everyone in Kenya is too scared to sell available as an e-book (understandable as our cronies in power are looking for any excuse to practice that big new word they learned - XTRA JUDISAL KIRINGS

Now you can buy it and download it from Harper Collins as an e-book for just £5.56

I love the web! And a hat tip to the hAndy man on the Hill...

IN SEARCH OF A NOBLE POLITICIAN

Zukiswa Wanner, a South African author has just visited Kenya & Zimbabwe where Continental Africa has born a new form of Western Democracy - Government of National Unity - Losers going to bed with Winners...

Citizens will continue paying taxes. No. That’s not a joke. I am genuinely looking for an honest and noble politician. A politician who cares about the interests of the electorate before theirs (and not just as rhetoric in an election year). And before anyone from the African continent says ‘Obama’ please don’t. Y’all don’t know him and even if you do and you are sure he is wonderful, he still doesn’t serve this continent.


Now where was I? Ja. I was talking of the need for a politician that can be trusted to serve and not be served. Would it not be refreshingly different if the electorate dispensed with the ‘chief/chef/honourable bani bani’ when talking to politicians and the politicians realized that there were in power to serve us and not vice-versa?


When I first went to Kenya , I told a Zimbabwean friend of mine that Nairobi reminded me of Harare when Harare was Harare (in the 90s). Well it looks like the two African nations have just had another similarity.


They are now both ruled by governments of national unity. Now here is the thing. There has never been a government of national unity formed when the incumbent wins the election fair and square. A GNU, African style, appears to happen when the losing side wants to hold on to power by any means necessary as in the case of the two examples I am writing about.


The winners (known prior to elections as the opposition) will then ask the international (Western) community to freeze aid to THE illegitimate government that has sworn itself in (politicians are clearly getting softer. Back in the days, the party that did not want to lose would hold on and the nation be damned. Perhaps we should thank the gods of Africa for small mercies?) A Kofi Annan or Thabo Mbeki will be brought in to get the two sides talking, and boom, a GNU is born.


For that reason one would therefore assume that this type of government, though generally said to be temporary until elections in 20-voetsek will work as a type of checks and balances government to ensure the resources are given to those who need them and that no corrupt behaviour goes on while both parties are watching each other like hawks? Particularly from the party that is NOT of the incumbent because they are the more honest politicians, right? Right? Wrong.


Not for these two countries that I mention at least. We knew the politicians in the old party were self-interested buggers but now the politicians in the new party, the party that’s supposedly of honour, comes out and proves that, as one Kenyan politician put it, though it may be ‘different trees, it’s same old forest.’


Non-Kenyans, and those who are not Kenya-philes like myself may not know this but late last year as the average Kenyan worried about the price of unga (maize meal), parliamentarians from both the so-called old and corrupt party and the new and honourable parties were deciding that it was necessary for them to have a monthly salary of US$10,000 and that amount should be tax free.


All this for their highly important job of mostly sleeping in parliament while teachers, who render a bigger service of educating the nation, are taxed to death on the peanuts they earn. When the nation protested, they were quickly silenced and a bill was put in parliament to muzzle the media that because they raised the questions first. There was more to come.


Cabinet members from both parties were soon implicated in the tender process of grinding maize meal. Turns out there were quite a few ‘companies’ that won contracts to grind maize meal and yet did not own any grinders at all. And it wasn’t so easy as to ask them to return the maize. Somehow the bags of maize meal had disappeared.


And that’s the first government of national unity.


Last week I returned from Zimbabwe. The Zimbabwean GNU is a little over a month old but clearly, the politicians are not wasting time.


We have all seen on television leaders of both parties begging international donors for aid to rebuild the country. It is admirable that both parties have united for the good of the nation. What’s less admirable is the fact that, in this space where politicians are asking the world for assistance to rebuild the once impressive Zimbabwean infrastructure, not a single cabinet member of either major party decided that it was not in the national interest for them to have three top class vehicles at their disposal.


Would it not have been revolutionary if some leader said, ‘uhhm, well no. My cabinet members will just have one state sponsored vehicle. Perhaps we could sell the Mercedes and the 4WD and give the funding to the treasury so teachers or doctors can be better paid?’ but no. That would have been too noble for our men and women.


And the rot was not just at the top.


As many know, revolutions generally begin in towns and so too with Zimbabwe . The majority of MDC supporters are in the cities and it is therefore no surprise that majority of councillors serving the towns are from MDC. So, many of these wonderful councillors (who by the way are supposed to have day jobs and leave the town clerk and his team of administrators to do their work in council) have decided to start frequenting council because for every appearance they make at the various town halls, they get paid.


Even in situations where there are no council meetings or meetings of their committee. But that’s not all. These wonderful city councillors had also decided that for some reason, they deserved free cellphones at council expense and some were even requesting….don’t laugh this is true….laundry allowance (I wonder whether this is money to pay the domestic workers?).


More worrisome though was the plot for discounts idea that many councillors passed.


Those who have been to Zimbabwe recently would have noticed that the Zimbabwean dollar is now non-existent. If one goes into a shop, they buy with Rands or US$ (with the US$ to the rand pegged on an easy to work with US$1 to R10).



Imagine then, a bunch of councillors deciding that they should be allowed to buy plots on a non-existent Zim$ rate for as much as 60 percent discount? Yup, true story. Fortunately for this part of the article, someone top up (Minister of Local Government with his three cars) decided to nip the behaviour of councillors in the bud and refused to allow the cellphones or the laundry allowances and while councillors can buy plots, they should buy them at the US$ value.


But what of all the other examples? Is this continent incapable of having any politicians who care more for the people they serve than they do for their pockets?


Is it alright for African nations to continue to bleed while politicians feed?


Your thoughts!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Anglo...lease....fleece...freeze

The global economic meltdown is obviously beginning to threaten the snow on the Swiss Alps and has got this little "neutral" country swinging into action. "The era of banking secrecy is over..." say the big fish at G2O...

The US is turning up every stone in search of loose change and scripting new Hollywood blockbusters is well underway following the recent arrests of two bankers from the world's largest manager of private wealth by assets: UBS

So justice is indeed poetic if not pro-active and this change in global climate is turning the heat up a few notches even in downtown Nairobi. Guess who's loot just got frozen?

Ours!

Alas, we have more to offer the world than just hard cash: Kwani taught us How to Write About Africa very well and now we can tax lyrical too: "The veil on the shadowy figures behind the Anglo Leasing..."


Too well in fact. And now it's not just all the metaphors that are turned upright. Figuratively speaking: one + one DOES NOT = two (anymore)...

Interested to know how it all really works? Then you have to learn how to creatively deconstruct non-fiction. I admit: I am one of those stupid is as stupid does kinda guys but I am learning which piece of chocolate to pick...


Click on image to enter...

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Martha mania and a taste of the UnderGround Lunatic...

If nothing else, Martha's resignation makes for great blogging (me I am just hoping that means we have to pay one less salary from our taxes...).

The stream of consciousness on Martha's resignation is best viewed on the Kenyan Blogs webring. And for those looking for some tasteless humour to go with yet another tasteless story, I highly recommend reading the Underground Lunatic...

Click on image to read post...

Monday, April 6, 2009

Notes from the Geneva Talk Shop

Kenyan Pundit was at the Geneva Conference and has three sets of notes well worth reading...

Click on image to read updates...

Muthoni Wanyeki, Head of KHRC writes about this talk shop in this week's East African. Click HERE for article

Friday, April 3, 2009

CELEBRATING THE LIFE OF A PATRIOT, WRITER, DREAMER, LIBERATOR, FRIEND

From International PEN Kenya chapter


CELEBRATING THE LIFE OF A PATRIOT, WRITER, DREAMER, LIBERATOR, FRIEND

Dear comrade,

Sunday the 5th will mark a month since our brother GPO Oulu was slain in cold blood. GPO was a man who burned with zeal and conviction for the rights of the oppressed and with the dream of a better Kenya. He was a man who even in death remains firmly affixed in the minds of all who knew him.

International PEN Kenya chapter, an organization that serves to promote freedom of expression, promote literature and defend and protect the rights of writers all over the world invites you to celebrate the life of GPO the essayist with us in a Reading Afternoon in his honour this Sunday the 5th of April at Wasanii restaurant at the Kenya National Theatre from 2pm to 5.30 pm. We will have readings from some of the essays Oulu prolifically wrote in his lifetime as well as have an open mic of poetry written in GPO’s honour and poems dedicated to him. This is an open event and every one of you is invited to share and read. Poems also in memory of fellow freedom fighter King’aara are also welcome.

If you would like to take part by reading one of GPO’s essays or performing a poem of your own (or even one by someone else, kindly show up on time on that day to be included in the programme. Circulate this invitation to all who knew him or all people you know that share the same dream of justice, love, peace and unity that Oulu passionately lived and heroically died for. We look forward to seeing you there.

One love.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Muthoni magic...

I love the concept and I loved the afternoon chilling by the little pond with some of my favourite voices in Kenya. And I loved the fact that so many people banded together to remember that millions in Kenya are facing starvation and part of the proceeds from the afternoon went to the Red Cross for famine relief. It is so hard to believe that in a country surrounded by so many beautiful people that it is possible to have the kind of politicians that we do. Let me not spoil it:

Muthoni Music and company are on their way to Diani on the South Coast on 12th April...

If you can' t go and you would like to make a donation towards the famine relief appeal specifically for victims of drought from the Kwale area in Kenya, you can make a secure donation on the Colobus Trust blog HERE.

If you wish to contact the South Coast Residents Association who are taking a lead on food distribution within the Diani area, visit their website HERE.

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